Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Are you calm and submissive?

Well I have been thinking about some of the great leaders in the world. What makes them so great? Am I any different? How do these people act in public? Now we all know what happens in the public eye sometimes does not happen behind closed doors. For now we are going to assume that people are the same in all occasions. I know I can hear everyone now!!! That is going to come back and haunt you like last nights garlic sausage! For the simplicity of this first exercise we are going to live the simple life. Maybe it is just me, maybe I make people more complicated then they really are. I have been privileged to get to watch Cesar Millan on television lately. Cesar is known as the dog whisperer. He talks about being calm and submissive. What does that term mean. Well when I was taking my training in counseling the first thing we learned was acting calm around people no matter how fired up they are. Try it some time, it is very amazing to see it work in action. When you think about it the last time you got angry if the other person was not buying into your anger people start to deescalate because of your calmness to the point they return to calmness, and forget why they were even angry. Suddenly that anger point is not so important all of a sudden. Cesar also brings a point that we as humans can learn from. Animals live in the now. They do remember the past, but given consistent behavior things start to change. The future is not even in their mind set. We as humans create the mind set as we are smart enough to expect more. Is being too smart for own good a down fall in this case? When talking to people especially when people are emotionally charged they will say; "you never", or "I always" do or not do something. REALLY I often question those statements, and hey I have even done it many times in the heat of the moment. We as humans by nature are generally not 100% consistent every time. It might be only a little variance, but there is some change. We are not machines. Only robots do things the same way every time. So that is the next point to the statement deescalate the situation and you should have submission. Now the key to this is consistency. I know the major lesson in life is don't buy into the behavior, and be assertive and consistent in your actions. You know I would have friends and people I talk to ask; "how do you work in an environment were people act differently?" What is normal I ask? I have always been one to question life, and its actions. So for today I am going to leave you with up coming posts in the future working off the calm, submissive to carry on in a balanced life. I guess this is called healing in the now. You and I can heal together.

Until text time remember:
There's no present. There's only the immediate future and the recent past.
George Carlin

Cheers
From The Big ape

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