Tuesday, June 23, 2009

The Plan

You know I really like Robin Williams, and after reading this not only do I like him as a very funny man. I respect him as a very smart man! He has a plan for the USA, and I think Canada should barrow a page from this plan also.

The Plan!

Robin Williams, wearing a shirt that says 'I love New York '
in Arabic.

You gotta love Robin Williams......Even if he's nuts! Leave it to Robin Williams to come up with the perfect plan. What we need now is for our UN Ambassador to stand up and repeat this message.

Robin Williams' plan...
(Hard to argue with this logic!)

'I see a lot of people yelling for peace but I have not heard of a plan for peace. So, here's one plan.'

1) 'The US will apologize to the world for our 'interference' in their affairs, past & present. You know, Hitler, Mussolini, Stalin, Tojo, Noriega, Milosevic, Hussein, and the rest of those 'good 'ole' boys', we will never 'interfere' again.

2) We will withdraw our troops from all over the world, starting with Germany , South Korea , the Middle East , and the Philippines . They don't want us there. We would station troops at our borders. No one allowed sneaking through holes in the fence.

3) All illegal aliens have 90 days to get their affairs together and leave We'll give them a free trip home. After 90 days the remainder will be gathered up and deported immediately, regardless of whom or where they are.. They're illegal!!! France will welcome them.

4) All future visitors will be thoroughly checked and limited to 90 days unless given a special permit!!!! No one from a terrorist nation will be allowed in. If you don't like it there, change it yourself and don't hide here. Asylum would never be available to anyone. We don't need any more cab drivers or 7-11 cashiers..

5) No foreign 'students' over age 21. The older ones are the bombers. If they don't attend classes, they get a 'D' and it's back home baby.

6) The US will make a strong effort to become self-sufficient energy wise. This will include developing nonpolluting sources of energy but will require a temporary drilling of oil in the Alaskan wilderness. The caribou will have to cope for a while

7) Offer Saudi Arabia and other oil producing countries $10 barrel for their oil. If they don't like it, we go someplace else. They can go somewhere else to sell their production. (About a week of the wells filling up the storage sites would be enough.)
8) If there is a famine or other natural catastrophe in the world, we will not 'interfere.' They can pray to Allah or whomever, for seeds, rain, cement or whatever they need. Besides most of what we give them is stolen or given to the army. The people who need it most get very little, if anything.

9) Ship the UN Headquarters to an isolated island someplace. We don't need the spies and fair weather friends here. Besides, the building would make a good homeless shelter or lockup for illegal aliens.

10) All Americans must go to charm and beauty school. That way, no one can call us 'Ugly Americans' any longer. The Language we speak is ENGLISH..learn it...or LEAVE...Now, isn't that a winner of a plan?

'The Statue of Liberty is no longer saying 'Give me your tired your poor, your huddled masses.' She's got a baseball bat and she's yelling, 'you want a piece of me?' '


Remember the goal toward which all history tends is peace, not peace through the medium of war, not peace through a process of universal intimidation, not peace through a program of mutual impoverishment, not peace by any means that leaves the world too weak or too frightened to go on fighting, but peace pure and simple based on that will to peace which has animated the overwhelming majority of mankind through countless ages. This will to peace does not arise out of a cowardly desire to preserve one's life and property, but out of conviction that the fullest development of the highest powers of men can be achieved only in a world of peace.

-- Robert Maynard Hutchins (1899-1977)

Cheers
From The Big Ape

Sunday, June 21, 2009

Becareful What You Wish For!

Well I would like to start off by wishing all the fathers out there a happy fathers day! I always get nervous on this day as I am not sure what wild seeds might come back to roost from my younger years. Actually I think I am pretty safe. When I was out their harvesting my wild oats I was sure to wear my rubber boots. I was a good farmer... Lol

Anyway as for the title the Canadian Government wants to ram another bill down our throats allowing them to be able to obtain your information from your cell phone ie. calls being recorded, and email information including what you write. Now there is a double edge to this sword. It is going to cost your providers whether it be internet or telephone a whole bunch of money to ramp up to do this . It is going to force the small providers out of business as the cost of doing business is going to out weigh what you are going to get as a benefit. Also we as customers are going to be on the hook for the cost of doing such an upgrade so it is a lose, lose proposition for we as customers.

The law enforcement agencies can approach a provider and under the "preservation order" obtain what you write or say. Call me an alarmist, I think this is a very slippery slope! Not only can they obtain what you have said or written they can get a court order to continue to receive it for 90 more days. Now I know I can hear you now if you have done nothing wrong what is your problem? Well again I don't believe that all law enforcement members are always on the up and up. Sorry I guess it has been that 10 years working in the court houses as a reporter. PEOPLE there is dirty cops out there! If you happen to beat a ticket, and piss off an officer who is to say he cannot fabricate a story present it to a judge, and get what he wants. I also don't think that all judges are perfect either. That code of "the wall of blue" blankets them too. Just look at that fiasco of the Polish gentleman getting tasered at the Vancouver airport. There has been a sea of lies in that case!

So in a day of people Twittering, Facebooking, Texting, Emailing, along with using their cell phone more then we ever have before we are now going to have to go back to days of actually talking to people face to face. That means people will actually go visit people again. Not like the teenagers of today that text each other when they are in the same room. You laugh, but I have seen this first hand. I think maybe the art of speaking maybe has just been thrown a life line. So before it is too late go text, fax, email, or call (LOL) your MP and tell him/her that the "preservation order" needs to die.

Until next time remember life is sexually transmitted. I hope all the fathers have the day they are hoping for.

Cheers
From The Big Ape

Saturday, June 6, 2009

What Is Rotten Ronnie Up To?

Well this is something that has been eating at my craw for about a month now. In my eyes Ronald McDonald has crossed the line. What do you ask has got my knickers in a knot with our favorite light-hearted clown? In Canada McDonald's canceled their orange drink!!! Some like the Mc-burgers, some the fries. Well I am different I went for the nector of the gods. Their orange drink. It was not pop as it was never carbonated. Then my Sister-in-law further added to that niggling of my last Mc-nerve, with this public letter;

CANADIAN Beef: Something to think about!

This IS A GOOD DECENT MAN WHO TOOK THE TIME TO WRITE THIS
AND: HE SIGNED THE STATEMENT AND: INCLUDED HIS CONTACT INFO:

I'm sure those of you who aren't in the cattle business don't understand the issues here. But to those of us whose living depends on the cattle market, selling cattle, raising the best beef possible... This is frustrating.
This will keep us from ever stopping there again, even for a drink.
The original message is from the Alberta Cattle Feeders Association Canadian cattle producers are very passionate about this.
McDonald's claims that there is not enough beef in Canada to support their restaurants. Well, we know that is not so. Our opinion is they are looking to save money at our expense. The sad thing of it is that the people of
Canada are the ones who made McDonald's successful in the first place, but we are not good enough to provide beef. We personally are no longer eating at McDonald's, which I am sure does not make an impact, but if we pass this around maybe there will be an impact felt.
Please pass it on. Just to add a note:
All Canadians that sell cattle at a livestock auction barn have to sign a paper stating that we do NOT EVER feed our cattle any part of another animal. South Americans are not required to do this as of yet.
McDonald's has announced that they are going to start importing much of their beef from South America. The problem is that South Americans aren't under the same regulations as Canadian beef producers, and the regulations they have are loosely controlled.
They can spray numerous pesticides on their pastures that have been banned here at home because of residues found in the beef. They can also use
various hormones and growth regulators that we can't.
The Canadian public needs to be aware of this problem and that they may be putting themselves at risk from now on by eating at good old McDonald's.
Canadian ranchers raise the highest quality beef in the world and this is what Canadians deserve to eat. Not beef from countries where quality is
loosely controlled. Therefore, I am proposing a boycott of McDonald's until they see the light.

I'm sorry but everything is not always about the bottom line, and when it comes to jeopardizing my family's health, that is where I draw the line.
I am sending this note to about thirty people. If each of you send it to at least ten more (30 x 10 = 300) ... and those 300 send it to at l east ten more (300 x 10 = 3,000) ... and so on, by the time the message reaches
the sixth generation of people, we will have reached over THREE MILLION consumers!
I'll bet you didn't think you and I had that much potential, did you? Acting together we can make a difference. If this makes sense to you, please pass this message on.
Larry Latam
Windsor (519)968-1791 London (519)488-2386

Now I think we as concerned shoppers should contact the rotten Ronnie HQ in Toronto Canada with our concerns. They can be called during normal business hours at
Toronto: (416) 446-3932 eastern standard time, and let them know we are not happy with their marketing concepts as of late. These big companies have forgotten how they got as big as they did on the stomachs of the red neck population. Like the email says if we just send this to ten people and it gets forwarded on. Sir Grease-a-lot will get the hint and start going back to what made them famous. The quarter pounder with cheese, a large orange drink, and a medium fries, with an apple pie. Now I must admit that is not the most heart smart meal in life, but every once and a while you need to take a trip on the wild side just to let your heart know you are still alive!

Until next time remember McDonalds announced it’s considering a more humane way of slaughtering its animals. You know they fatten them up and then kill them. You know the same thing they do to their customers, isn’t it?

Jay Leno

Cheers
From The Big Ape

Thursday, June 4, 2009

The Dreaded Talk.....

As many parents just think about talking to their kids about sex education, a bead of sweat percolates on their brow. Or is that way any more? Can kids of today have a candid discussion with Mom and Dad about the birds and the bees? Studies show that although kids are sexually active today they are not getting the right information to protect themselves. Today of all times with sexually transmitted diseases kids and adults alike need to be informed properly to stop the vicious cycle. Can you believe it or not the senior population is a very high carrier of STD's. Why is that? Are they too embarrassed to talk about sex to their doctors and or family? They are just having unprotected sex anyway. Thinking what do we have to lose at our age? I know some people think that is just wrong that Grandma is still getting action at 80 years old. Remember their might be snow on the roof, but there is still fire in the furnace. Now for the senior population you would think they would be wiser, and not making silly mistakes like that. Remember though back in their day sex is not something you talked about openly. Now fast forward 60 years sex is everywhere. I pose the question to you. Do you think it is the job of the school to teach sex to your children? Going back to my day, and I know this is dating me a bit I remember a story of our sex-ed teacher telling us boys if we got REAL DESPERATE we could use a piece of liver in a plastic bag. Now at the time we all thought this was just way too funny, but now I look back from an adult prospective, and wonder what he was thinking telling a bunch of adolescent boys with hormones on high to use liver in a pinch. Two points to this story:
1. I am not sure where he is getting his women from, but believe you me if I had a women that felt like liver I would take her to a doctor immediately!
2. As much as I still like liver as a meal I still look at liver and get a funny feeling when I thin k of that teacher.

Should teachers that teach sex education take a special course on the subject? Who is making sure they are passing on the right information? With today's computer education, and media advancement. I am a bit puzzled why teens would feel misinformed or uninformed when it came to sex education. In days when the teens of today are far more smarter then the youth of the past you would think that not only would the teens be better informed they would be practicing safer sex in today's society. That just goes to show you all the education in the world does not over turn maturity regardless of the age.

Until next time remember; “Men reach their sexual peak at eighteen. Women reach theirs at thirty-five. Do you get the feeling that God is playing a practical joke?”

Cheers
From The Big Ape

Tuesday, June 2, 2009

Breakfast Anyone?

I was always told if you woman cannot find you handsome they better find you handy. Well I think Mellody lost out on both counts, but then again maybe I can be a bit handy at times. This is kind of interesting I will have to give this a try.





ZIPLOC
OMELET

(This
works great !!! Good for when all your family is
together. The best part is that no one has to
wait for their special omelet
!!!)

Have
guests write their name on a quart-size Ziploc
freezer bag with permanent
marker.

Crack
2 eggs (large or extra-large) into the bag (not
more than 2) shake to combine
them.

Put
out a variety of ingredients such as: cheeses,
ham, onion, green pepper, tomato, hash browns,
salsa, etc.

Each
guest adds prepared ingredients of choice to
their bag and shake. Make sure to get the air
out of the bag and zip it
up.

Place
the bags into rolling, boiling water for exactly
13 minutes [we did 15 minutes]. You can usually
cook 6-8 omelets in a large pot. For more, make
another pot of boiling
water.

Open
the bags and the omelet will roll out easily. Be
prepared for everyone to be
amazed.

Nice
to serve with fresh fruit and coffee cake;
everyone gets involved in the process and a
great conversation piece.

Cheers
From the Big Ape